sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
