I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
