we're blogging at a bar
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
