CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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