You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
