FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Randomize