Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize