Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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