I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
