spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
a search helicopter?!
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
