Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
