Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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