You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
