what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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