I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
