Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
