naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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