Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
