I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
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