walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize