Heybabeimwearingurpanties
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
