Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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