Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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