You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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