Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
