I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize