try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
they're like a gay fantastic four
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
