So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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