I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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