I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
thus making me awesome and them whores
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
