So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
