I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
