Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
even my farts smell like vagina
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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