It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
