Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
