i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
