I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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