We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
