Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
