I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
