I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
