Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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