even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
