It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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