Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
