As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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