I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
