im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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