I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
