I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I think I have vodka in my lungs
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
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